Fallen Ray

Title: Marine Snow
Artist: Sukima Switch
Single: Marine Snow

Original PV

Live

Lyrics taken from Mognet

僕は孤独の海　放り出されて　もうさ　溺れてしまうのかなぁ
boku wa kodoku no umi houri dasarete mou sa oborete shimau no ka naa
とはいえ這い上がれない　どうせ堕ちるなら朽ちて
to wa ie hai agarenai dou se ochiru nara kuchite
深海魚のエサになれ
shinkaigyo no esa ni nare

I’m hurled into a sea of loneliness; Oh man, I wonder if I’m going to drown
So no, I can’t drag myself out; anyway, if I fall, then I’ll rot away
I’m going to become bait for deep sea fishes

君のこと　空気みたいだと思っていた　失くしたら息苦しくて
kimi no koto kuuki mitai da to omotte ita nakushitara iki gurashikute

I had thought that you were ethereal; If I lost you, I would suffocate

体がただ沈んでゆく　遠ざかっていく空　群青に埋まっていく
karada ga tada shizunde yuku toozakatte iku sora gunjou ni uzumatte iku
僕らもっと色濃く混ざりあえていたなら…
bokura motto iro koku mazari aete ita nara…

My body is simply sinking, the sky is going far off, I’m getting buried in ultra marine
If only we could have had a stronger relationship…

君のいない海を逃れようとしたけど　想い出の重さで泳げない
kimi no inai umi wo nogareyou to shita kedo omoide no omo sa de oyogenai

I tried to run away from the sea that you weren’t at, but I can’t swim with the weight of my own memories

存在を愛情に求めていた　行為はカタチだけになっていた
sonzai wo aijou ni motomete ita koui wa katachi dake ni natte ita
感覚が鈍っていく　何も聴こえない　目を閉じてるかもわからない
kankaku ga nnibutte iku nani mo kikoenai me wo tojiteru ka mo wakaranai

I was searching for life, with love, and my deeds were taking shape
My senses are dulling, I can’t hear anything; I don’t know if my eyes are open or not

君のしぐさ　君の中のぬくもり　浮かんでは消えていくんだ
kimi no shigusa kimi no naka no nukumori ukande wa kiete iku n da

The way you acted, the warmth within you; Those things are all floating before me, and disappearing

世界が今断ち切られて　藻掻けば絡まり　絶望に染まっていく
sekai ga ima tachi kirarete mogakeba karamari zetsubou ni somatte iku
僕がもっと君の瞳を見ていられたなら…
boku ga motto kimi no hitomi wo mite irareta nara…

Now, the world is broken; When I struggle, I become entangled, and I’m becoming colored in despair
If only I could have looked into your eyes more…

誰もいない闇は記憶だけ残して　僕から全てを奪っていく
dare mo inai yami wa kioku dake nokoshite boku kara subete wo ubatte iku

Only memories are left behind in the darkness, where no one else is; Everything is being snatched away from me

体がただ沈んでゆく　涙も叫びも深海がさらっていく
karada ga tada shizunde yuku namida mo sakebi mo shinkai ga saratte iku
どうせならもう抜け殻になってしまえば
dou se nara mou nuke gara ni natte shimaeba

My body is simply sinking, the depths of the sea are washing away my tears and cries
I wish I could just turn into a cast-off skin, already

{FR}: THE BEST PART is coming …

ずっとこのまま時間を超えて　深い意識の淵漂っていられたら
zutto kono mama jikan wo koete fukai ishiki no fuchi tadayotte iraretara
僕は一人　ここで生まれ変われるのかなぁ
boku wa hitori koko de umare kawareru no ka naa

If only I could drift about in the depths of my deep subconscious, passing through time, staying like this forever
I wonder if I can be reborn here, alone

君のいない海で生きていこうとしたけど　想い出の重さで、泳げない
kimi no inai umi de ikite ikou to shita kedo omoide no omo sa de, oyogenai

I tried to live my life at sea that you weren’t at, but I can’t swim with the weight of my own memories

snapped hardest.

is always right.

Right there, below my feet.

Sheef: They remind me of you …

- SandLand Volume 01 Chapter 002

Yesterday, a friend of mine told me that singing and creating a song is two totally different matters.
Even if you could sing a song or play a music sheet thousand times perfectly,
it doesn’t guarantee that you could make your own music.

You need what so called creativity factor.
It was something you’re born with…
and so on, we caught in a deep debate of theory of creativity.
He’s an artist anyway.

I whole heartily disagree. It sounds too pessimistic.
What if you’re born without creativity?
Could we learn it? or couldn’t we?

I have my own theory of creativity,
which i hold dear for a long time.
It has been proven to be true throughout my life.

Let say when i start learning how to write.
I started with imitating alphabet “a” from textbook.
As expected, my first effort was a total mess.
Even my parents recognized it as a snake,
not nearly close to an “a”.

After several trials, i can perfectly draw an “a”.
Event though all of the “a” i write are not exactly the same,
I don’t feel disheartened.

That’s the beauty of human creation.
We’re perfect because we’re imperfect.
It’s what i always believe anyway.

What i want to say is, i can write now.
Well obviously, otherwise i wouldn’t graduate from primary school.

After i wrote those alphabets thousand to billion times.
Can i design my own alphabet now?
Yes, of course.

Look at the caterpillar.

It eats the very same leaves every day.
Doing the same thing,
crawling and eating.
Moving its jaw up and down (does caterpillar has jaw?)
Eat and eat for half of its life.

Then one day, without really realizing it,
it miraculously morphed into butterfly.
Flies toward the beautiful sky.

When it was a caterpillar, does it even think like this?
“I will stuff my stomach with all of this fluffy green stuff,
as much as i can see, so that i can fly one day.”

NO!

If you have time to think whether you would have that creativity one day,
it would be thousand times better to just do the routine of work you’re good at.

Someday, you WILL get that creativity.

If you swim everyday, would you become better at swimming?
Yes.
If you imitate others’ works every day, would you be the best imitators?
Yes and not only as an imitators.
You’ll find yourself as creator with creative skill.

Every single thing that you have done,
are built up and become a part of you.

Do the same thing over and over,
until something ring out of your head…
One day, when you say,
“Hey it’s would looks better if i add this here”.
I guarantee that what you did at this moment
is a genuine product of your creative work.

Creativity is either an imitation of existing being or just a dumb luck.

Don’t be afraid to imitate.
But don’t forget to stand firm,
and be your best self.

To stand firm means to know what you want.
To imitate means to know how to get it.

Art is a product of creativity.
Coding is an art.
I’m an amazing coder.
… what a shameless plug.

See ya.

In Life, Compassion.

- Japanese proverb
Tabiwa michizure yowa nasake

just a bit smarter than all of you.

But Who are We to Judge.

I (*edit: almost) got drowned in one of my swimming class when i was in primary school. The pool’s depth is only 2-3 meters, but my height was one hundred twenty something meter at that time. I was really scared.

Only the tip of my fingers can reach the air. There’s no ground on my cramped foot. I lost my breath. I’m in panic. My vision slowly become blurry. All my surroundings turn into blueish. My soul was on the tip of my mouth. One of the most scariest moment in my life, ever. After that, this damned light blue color always stuck on my head every single day. Well, i’m really glad that i still have “another” day anyway.

One day, I saw this color again on one of encyclopedia book for kids. My parent bought it as birthday gift. The blue in this book is much heavier, more shaded, and much much more mesmerizing. It was the color of deep blue sea.

Since then, I always fond of a small range of color spectrum which called blue. To be more specific, it’s dark blue similar to navy blue but a bit darker.

The thing is, i don’t like deep sea. I don’t like, which really close to hate. Not exactly hate, it’s just “fear” not “hate”.

Why would i like the color of something i don’t like? Huh. I don’t know. My best answer… Favorite color is not necessarily from the one you really like. Or, maybe i do like fear. Hmm, that’s questionable.

The story continues … after several years, i getting curious if there’s a meaning behind color. What is blue, green or red?

This semester, I took Human Visual Information class. I hope i can get a good mark here. Wish me luck… Oh, what are we talking about? … Color meaning? Right!

On one chapter, we learn about color more deeply. During my study, well actually my mind was just wandering off again, i came across the meaning of color. Here, i quoted one for my own favorite color. You could check yours on the site.

Blue is the overwhelming “favorite color.” Blue is seen as trustworthy, dependable and committed. The color of sky and the ocean, blue is perceived as a constant in our lives.

As the collective color of the spirit, it invokes rest and can cause the body to produce chemicals that are calming; however not all blues are serene and sedate. Electric or brilliant blues become dynamic and dramatic, an engaging color that expresses exhilaration.

Some shades or the overuse of blue may come across as cold or uncaring. Blue is the least “gender specific” color, having equal appeal to both men and women.

How the color blue effects us physically and mentally
* Calming and sedate
* Cooling
* Aids intuition

Taken from: http://www.squidoo.com/colorexpert

What’s written on this site, by so called color expert, are marvelous. Majority would agree. I am, but i’d say that it is not 100% true.

One reason, during the class i learn about perception. Our experience might not be the same with others. The blue i saw might not as blue as others think. We have different physical structures.

Other reason, there’s a psychology there which is manufactured from our physical sense. It might be triggered from past experience which produce some kind of emotion. Like when i see blue color from my eye, i remember deep sea and how i was drowned. Then it would trigger the emotion called fear.

So, sometimes i could trigger fear just by seeing blue color. Unlike others who would feel calm, cool, cold, etc. I don’t believe the universal color meaning. I do believe that favorite color is very close related with personality and one’s past personal experience. Knowing favorite color gives us hint but not permission to judge someone. That’s all folks.